80 Comments
If you are an adult with T1D, how much has type 1 diabetes affected your thought-process and decision to have/not have children?
You must be logged in to post a comment.
© 2023 T1D Exchange. All Rights Reserved.
Doc at age 58, too late daughter was 30.
I decided not to have children because of another disease I have, but diabetes would not have mattered to me in deciding whether to have children if I did not have my other disease. Because I have never married, I would not plan on having children even if I hadn’t had any diseases. Lastly, with so many children needing a home, I think I would have wanted to adopt a child/children if I were married and my husband and I would have wanted children.
Being T1D, having CF didn’t play a roll in having children.
I would not let the negative valence of a T1D having children be dictated by either the certainties or uncertainties of so-called genetic determinism. Events always conspire to defeat glib certainty.
I was diagnosed with LADA at age 65. The window to decide whether to have or not have children had long-since been closed.
I had kids years before I was diagnosed
My wife and I have three children, all adults now. Our oldest was diagnosed with T1D at age 23. I was 18 when diagnosed.
I did not get Type 1 until 6 years after I had my children.
I was diagnosed at age 23, just after getting married. The doctor told me I might live another 10 years. We decided not to have children. After five years, and no signs of an early death, we had one daughter. She’s in her 40’s now, and I’m 69 and still kicking.
Good for you!
My daughter was 15 when I was diagnosed with LADA.
DEFINITELY! For many years, I thought I should NOT have children because of T1D — but I later realized I was just afraid. Once I’d seen enough people sharing their experiences, I realized I could do it, too!
I wrote the first-ever guide to pregnancy with T1D because we absolutely need specialized guidance that other generalized diabetes/pregnancy books can’t offer:
https://www.amazon.com/Pregnancy-Type-Diabetes-Month-Month/dp/1544267347/ref=sr_1_1?crid=35FSV7JNPJVEF&keywords=pregnancy+with+type+1+diabetes&qid=1675046322&sprefix=pregnancy+typ%2Caps%2C159&sr=8-1&asin=1544267347&revisionId=&format=4&depth=1
Ginger, I love your book!! I have read it during all 3 of my pregnancies and it has been incredibly helpful. Educational and encouraging – I actually recommend it in my comment above! Thank you for this contribution to the T1D community.
I did not have T1D during my child bearing years.
I was diagnosed in my 30s, when my husband and I were just starting highly demanding jobs. We barely saw each other for weeks at a time and I knew he’d be no help with a high risk pregnancy or kids. Growing up as big sister to three younger sibs, I had no illusions about the amount of energy it takes to raise kids. My window of opportunity passed before I figured out how to make it all work.
I was 12 when diagnosed. My parents were told that I was not likely to live passed 25, but also said a cure was only 10 years away.
I did have kids anyway.
Growing up, I never wanted kids because of my emetophobia. When I was diagnosed at 21, I realized that T1D could now be my “reason” to tell people why I didn’t have kids. 😉
Not at all. I was dx’ed just before turning 61. I’m not sure what my decision would have been otherwise.
My T1D began in 1963; I was too heavily influenced by my mother’s fears and decided to have a tubal ligation. On Feb. 26, 1979, when I was only 21, I had my tubes tied. February 26, 1979 was also the date of the last total solar eclipse over the continental U.S. in the 20th century. The waning and waxing images from that day stick in my mind: the total eclipse of the sun became the perfect metaphor for a mistake I still regret.
I’m almost 50 now but was diagnosed at age 20 and married at 23. My OB/GYN told me at the time that, if I wanted children, I should have them before I turned 30 but I was in grad school with no plans of kids anytime soon. My first child was born 6 weeks before I turned 30, so I did manage to beat that “deadline” but I had my second at age 34 without issue. My kids are now ages 20 and 16 and are (knock on wood) perfectly healthy.
When I was diagnosed in 1970 at age 12 having children was not immediately addressed but I grew up with the impression that if I was going to have children it would be better to have them before I was too old (old was thirty back then!) I made up my mind I was not going to have children before age 24 or after age 27. I had my daughter 1 month after turning 24 and my son 2 months before I turned 28. Both pregnancies were difficult and my children were both delivered by c-section about 10 days before my due date. I am thankful that both babies were healthy and neither has shown any signs of t1d and are 41 and 36. But wait… my daughter married a t1d’er! I didn’t want them to have children (I did not tell them that!) but my granddaughter is 21 and my grandson is 14 with no signs! (kow)
My husband and I knew we wanted to have children, and I was not going to let T1D prevent us from doing that. I did make sure to have a pre-conception appointment with an MFM and worked hard to get my A1c well below 6% before trying to conceive. I educated myself (can’t recommend “Pregnancy with Type 1 Diabetes” by Ginger Vieira and Jennifer Smith highly enough). With a lot of hard work, patience, and a solid care team, I am in trimester 3 of my third very healthy pregnancy – and hopefully not my last!
I am 70 and had my children at ages 34 and 40. Tyoe 1 diabetes played a large factor in my decision but I felt comfortable having children after consulting with my endocrinologist and OB/GYN. I went to a high-risk OB/GYN for both pregnancies. I followed his guidance, and my pregnancies went well. I also was in good control of my diabetes, which also affected my decision. I was diagnosed at age 25 with T1D.
I was diagnosed at age 7. I had one child by C-section at the age of 21 and had my tubes at the same time he was delivered. It was the right decision for me.
I got pregnant before we had made the decision, so we went ahead and had one. Had my tubes tied after that. Our son is 45, no T1d, with three teenage grandkids, no T1d. Happy endings.
My wife was past reproductive age when I got diabetes (I was 56), so my answer would be NA. I had other reasons for not having children.
Diagnosed T1 at 57, I had my children long before then.
Not at all because I got T1 age 51. 🙂
Diagnosed at age 45 as a T1D I had already built my family and had 4 kids. I would say they are one of the main reasons I have taken such good care. The day I was diagnosed I came home and told them “will this change me, sure it will, but just you watch while I kick diabetes’ ass.” I think back about making this commitment to them, and still maintain it is a big part of my success managing this disease. (my TIR has typically well above 80% for 4 years now. My a1c has never been left the 5’s after 7 years of being a T1D.
Our/my 4 children were born prior to my T1 diagnosis. Diagnosis for me was at 40 years of age. I did not experience gestational diabetes.
I was diagnosed in 1995 at the age of 18 y. I was never told I couldn’t or shouldn’t have children by my doctors. I understood that like most things, a T1D pregnancy would be higher risk for me and baby and that I would have to work a bit by harder to keep my sugars in control. I had 2 boys in my early 30s. They were both BIG (~10lbs) but healthy. They are now in their early teens. No T1D and no T1D autoantibodies. The pregnancies did not seem to promote any diabetes complications for me. I’m fortunate to still be retinopathy-free and kidney function good.
I wasn’t diagnosed as T1D when I become a parent.
Yes, I had only one child due to the struggles with low blood sugars while sleeping. I went into convulsions on a few occasions b/c we didn’t have the tools we have today. My husband wouldn’t agree to having a second child after the first experience.
Diagnosed with T1D long after having had children.
I was diagnosed at 56. I had already had my 3 boys. 2 of which are T1d’s
Dx @15 1964, had Beautiful Valentines Girl in 71 and Vasectomy in 84. Daughter had Gestational Dm with first Birth, nothing since.
Not at all, I was diagnosed a an adult and already had two children.
I was diagnosed at age 12 and I don’t remember anyone talking to me about having or not having children. I married at 23, had an unplanned pregnancy that began when I was 24. I was not seeing an endocrinologist at the time (in 1979), but my OB doctor sent me to one. Both of the doctors made comments to me about maybe ending the pregnancy, but my answer was a definite NO!!! It was a hard pregnancy without the better insulin and technology that is available today. I went into labor approximately 6 weeks before my estimated due date. Since a Caesarian had been planned, no one had explained anything to me about going through labor, so that took longer and was harder on me than it should have been. Anyway I delivered a 7 pound, 11 ounce boy. He had jaundice and a slight heart murmur at first , but that cleared up after a short stay in the hospital. My son is 42 now and bloodwork has indicated he will not become a T1D. Same with his 2 children. That was my only pregnancy. I am now 67.
I did not get married until I was 30 in 1985. I had been diagnosed since I was 6 years old in 1961. Due to my age and the length of time since diagnosis I decided not to have children. I was fearful. I was told that a pregnancy would be high risk – that I could not be “too emotional” and that I would hospitalized if my blood pressure went up for monitoring. I did not think I could do that!! Also, no pump or CGM for me at the time. My husband and I adopted a beautiful baby girl when she was 1 week old////1
Was diagnosed after having kids….I was almost 50.
Interesting question. My dad, who had T1D, dx’ed in 1931 was upset when we told him my wife and I were expecting. Not the response I expected, considering he had three out of four sons with T1D. My oldest, of three sons has T1D and his oldest of two daughters has T1D. It has not stopped us. We love our kids and grandchildren.
T1D actually helped me in my family planning. I knew from a very young age that I was not mommy material. All throughout my 20’s I tried to get my tubes tied. Back then, it was an elective hospital procedure requiring approval by “the board”. The board was all old white doctors, who insisted they knew me better than I did, and knew that I would change my mind. They also knew that since I wasn’t married, someday I would meet “the” man and would want to make him happy with babies! My OB/GYN attended those hearings with me, having my back.
Then… at 31 years old, T1D Dx. I got a phone call from my OB/Gyn. He said he was sorry about my Dx, and told me I would do well – praising my intelligence. Then he said he had good news for me.
With my T1D Dx, not only could I get the sterilization, but insurance would pay for it. We scheduled it straight away.
I was diagnosed at age 10 in 1962. When I reached my 30s, my life was good. I enjoyed an incredible sense of well-being and health, despite having had a few problems along the way. I had been warned that I was unlikely to ever become pregnant, so my husband and I were surprised but delighted to become 30-something first-time parents.
My doctors were amazingly subtle about the high-risk adventure. More than one asked me “are you happy about this,” at the outset, but never acted any way but pro-active and positive once it was established that I was indeed very happy.
My healthy son has been a delight.
I was diagnosed in 1969 at 7 and was “counseled” by my internist at 21 to never have children. I listened. In the meantime, two of my college mates with T1 went on to have children. One has two who do not have diabetes and one who had one who has T1.
I got T1 after I had kids. My kids don’t have T1 but my son’s 2 sons have it.
I was diagnosed at 14. I never even considered not having children, and didn’t know some diabetics were advised not to. I had my first child at 28, second at 30 and third at 32. None of them have diabetes. I love being a mother and can’t imagine not having them.
Some. We decided one and done since the first pregnancy went so well we didn’t want to risk any future complications with subsequent. Plus me and kids are expensive. Lol
I always wanted to have children, but I didn’t get married till I was 42, we tried everything but couldn’t. So now we have cats. None with diabetes yet.
The sequelae of T1D kind of made the decision for me. By the time I was ready to have children, I was on BP meds and it was cautioned not to have children if taking these meds. We adopted instead.
Adult onset T1D. I already had children, thank goodness.
I had my five children before I developed LADA diabetes.
The thought of bringing a child into the world and them getting diagnosed with T1, and then having them look at me and say, “So, you knew there was a good chance you could pass down this disease and all the hardships that come with it, and you still had me?” is what keeps me from having children. It’s selfish.
I found out I was T1D and a few weeks later we found out my wife was pregnant. So T1D was never a consideration.
I was 90% sure at age 13 I was not going to have kids. Getting diabetes just added to my overall feeling on not having kids.
When I was diagnosed in 1975, my gynecologist recommended I not have children. I refused to accept his advice and was open to pregnancy.
It affected me SO much! All my life, doctors and caretakers put the fear of death into me about having children. They also weren’t shy about sharing how T1D would affect any children I might have. (I also thought subconsciously that I would die by my 18th birthday… didn’t realize I had this subconscious thought until I turned 19.) So, through my teens and 20s, those negative words translated to I _should_ _not_ have children. (This was in the era before BS meters, let alone CGMs.) I became very, very afraid of having kids. I purposefully married a man who did not want children because of this.
A few decades passed and, now past child bearing years, I was asked a question (by a therapist) about my lack of children and I started balling and couldn’t stop. I guess I had buried some sort of maternal need very, very deeply.
I’m glad there is more knowledge, more resources, and more health tools for T1Ds now!
As an aside, societally speaking, I find it interesting that we must have an “excuse” for _not_ having children… but we don’t have to have an excuse for _having_ them.
It’s also interesting how it brings a conversation to an awkward, screeching halt when someone asks if you have kids and you say no.
Yay to me! The conversation killer! ;p (jk)
I’m sorry you felt badgered like that. I think all humans have the desire to procreate. I hope you are able to help those young people around you who may need an extra parent.
Thank you, Sue! That’s very kind of you.
And, yes! I do try to help those around me who need an extra parent. 🙂
We had our first child before I was diagnosed with T1, but it wouldn’t have affected the decision to have children, and we did have another one later.
I decided not to have children due to kidney damage caused by my T1D. I was traumatized by the Steele Magnolia’s movie.
I had 2 boys before being diagnosed. With that said, both have tested negative for T1 antibodies (Trialnet)
Disposed with type 1 in 1960 at age 10. Married at 20, and pregnant , by accident, at 21. Had excellent care by specialists in Madison, WI . I was a senior at the university at the time. Is spite of the best care you could get back then, I lost that baby when 7 months pregnant. We purposely tried again a few months later , had so so care cause we had moved, and had our son 3 weeks early, 8 lbs 11 ounces, who stayed in the nursery for about another week with lung issues and issues with having been producing insulin for both of us.. oh, and bruises on each side of his head from forceps. He’s now a very healthy 50 year old man with no sign of any autoimmune issues. Life is amazing sometimes!
We tried once to have children even though I have numerous autoimmune conditions. After the miscarriage, it was decided that we stick to pets.
If I only had diabetes and Hashimoto’s, I assume we would have children.
I was 42 when diagnosed with Diabetes and had decided not to have children at age 28.
In 1969 it was a great concern and because of that, as newly weds, had an appointment with my physician. He advised us that there would be risks, but because after 14 years living w T1D, I was healthy, in my early 20’s and my husband had no medical history of diabetes in his family, if we wanted children we should have them within the next 6 to 8 years. We both still had a year of undergrad studies left and had planned to wait several years, but, surprise, surprise the following year I was pregnant. I saw a high risk OB who simply looked at my urine test log and monitored my blood pressure. In April of 1970 I started experiencing edema in my ankles. I started seeing the OB every other week. In May higher education in the S.F. Bay Area went on strike, so I didn’t have classes to attend, and because of elevated blood pressure was told to maintain bed-rest as much as possible. June 20, schools were still closed, but the San Francisco Art Institute still held graduation ceremonies and my husband and I received our degrees. I was very swollen, not eating much and running high urine tests. I started having weekly OB appointments. July 17 at my weekly appointment my blood pressure was so high the OB told me to go directly to the hospital. At the hospital I was told I had preeclampsia. Baby wasn’t due for 6 weeks. Sunday evening my water broke and I started labor. Monday morning at 6:30 our daughter was delivered by c-section. Although she was 6 weeks early, she was a 7 lb. 15.5 oz. preemie. She was kept in the Neonatal ICU for three days until I was released and we went home together. In her mid-thirties she was dx with lupus erythematous, an autoimmune disease. Her three children are in their 20’s , show no signs of any autoimmune diseases. My endo thinks the chronic kidney disease she dx. 3 years ago started with my pregnancy in 1970.
I have never been married, so having children was never a question for me.
After 2 children born premature and my diabetes getting worse we decided not to have any more but neither of my boys are diabetic and after slow start esp if youngest we are thankful they have no lasting effect of my t1d
I had 2 children when I developed type 1 diabetes at age 35. I was hoping to have 3-4 at that age but after talking with my primary doctor he kind of scared me (1978) regarding possibilities. I decided that maybe i should be grateful fro the two I had and adopt another.. We tried but it was prohibitively expensive which really surprised me. We did not have the money to pay for the adoption at that time. I am very content that I had the two healthy ones I have. (one developed type 1 diabetes at age 13) She is doing very well and had two beautiful girls herself with all the technology available to her.
At the time of having our first child I was unaware of the genetic makeup of T1 as I was newly diagnosed and didn’t receive adequate information with regards to it, so it didn’t affect our decision to have a child.
I had children years before I got type 1 diabetes.
Other- I had 4 children and and developed T 1 sometime after pregnancy. I did not develop gestational diabetes. I did develop Hashimoto’s thyroiditis at age 21.
I developed T1D a few years after giving birth to my last child! But, had I already had T1D first, I likely would not have had children of my own – adopted instead.
My twins were born before I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes . I found out that I was a diabetic after a year of giving birth and not suffering gestational diabetes either.
ME/cfs, endometriosis, and adenomyosis were the biggest culprits to my deciding not to have children at all—not even through adoption or fostering. T1D concerns added to the other concerns. I just didn’t (and don’t) have the stamina to raise children. Plus, I wasn’t sure I could conceive.
Being child free is best for me.
Diagnosed after I had my 4 kids so no answers really worked.
Having T1D didn’t impact my decision to have children, but did impact my decision re: the number of children I’ll have. Pregnancy was stressful for me trying to keep such tight range 24/7, and doing that with an “incumbent child” was even harder!
I was diagnosed when my 3 sons were adults!
Born during WWII I was a a member of the lost generation which preceded baby boomers. My mother was influenced by Eugenics., a correlative social movement to Nazism which exists today as white supremacy. After her first borne (me) developed T1D, she gave up Eugenics ideology. Nevertheless, the Eugenics ideology influenced my thinking and I decided to never have children, a statistically stupid error. This “pure race” or caste BS or religious nationalism is manifested as Zionist genocide of Palestinians, Trumpism, Putin’s White Russian Orthodox Christian nationalism as well as Buddhist Myanmar human rights violations of Muslims. Please view the PBS documentaries on Eugenics and read at least one of the books explaining its basis on social Darwinism. Want a perfect baby? Today’s DNA CRISPR technology makes it possible. Can you define “perfect”? Blue-eyed and blonde? Do you “qualify” as a sperm doner?
Diabetes never seemed like an ‘disease’ to me as a child or as a young adult of childbearing age. I asked my endo if it was ok to proceed with childbearing, but since T1D can be treated and is not a death sentence, I saw no reason to not have children. My 41 year old son is not diabetic.
My child was born about 7 weeks after I was diagnosed with T1D. Having it did not affect my decision not to have more children.